Dreamer's Crescendo
by ellumina
Summary: Leaving her never meant that he’d stopped dreaming of her. Cloud x Tifa
1. Hero of the Universe

Disclaimer: Final Fantasy VII and Advent Children are properties of Square Enix.

**A/n:** I'm trying a multi chapter for a change, something that focuses on Cloud's thoughts when he was away and the Cloud/Tifa confrontation (sort of) right after AC. Hope you like it.

**Dreamer's crescendo**

_Summary:_ Leaving her never meant that he'd stop dreaming of her. Cloud x Tifa

**Hero of the universe**

She felt like a stranger to the hero of the universe.

Even when he knew no one better.

The brush of comfort he radiated with his presence was gentle against her heart, like soothing fingers, sweeping away the fading traces of loneliness. But Tifa was terrified of giving into the comfort, more than she'd ever been before.

Her misty gaze swept across a room rattled with celebrations and found the lone man standing in the corner, leaning against the circular wall, looking exhausted and feeling happy. And in her heart, a familiar pang of something she was reluctant to name as pain, once again, shot through, forcing the delicate features of her face to crumble into a wince softened only by the soothing laughter of her children.

The metallic walls of Cid's new airship vibrated with the music and the laughter that echoed within. The sound was heavy and loud in her ears, a constant pounding upon her sharp hearing, but it did little to drown the soft, lazy whispers of her insecurities echoing in her mind.

It hurt to feel like a stranger to Cloud, but he'd been gone for so long, leaving at a time so turbulent, that Tifa couldn't find it anywhere inside her to lift her hopes again. There had been so many things the hero of the universe had shared with his childhood friend, things that went far beyond the simple materiality of a shared house, all shattered by the decision he'd made to leave her and their children in the unforgiving hands of time.

The turmoil inside her only grew, cruelly expanding in her heart when she set her weary gaze on Cloud again. Emotions she wasn't sure she welcomed spiraled to the surface of her thoughts and her body tensed suddenly, bracing for an attack she had no power to avoid.

Cloud Strife had always had a considerable effect on her.

_Cloud,_ she inwardly whispered, the fear and the sorrow that laced her unspoken words inaudible to all but herself. _I don't know how to be with you anymore._

She knew she still meant a lot to him. That she still meant the world to him but the familiarity of his gaze and the comfort of his words were fading away and with it the security and the easiness he'd once made her feel.

She couldn't stop being a bit more wary around him, a bit more careful, less ready to be the person she was with her friends. It was almost like she was dealing with one of the strangers she'd met in her journey though life. Always pleasant, always polite and just a little reserved.

The awkwardness was breaking her heart, but it stayed there, growing inside her, along with well-hidden traces of the hurt and loneliness he'd given her when he left her alone.

Between them, things had gone fairly well when the world was still in danger and her children were taken. Back then, her only thought was to bring them back and no awkwardness or hurt would have been strong enough to stand in her way. But now, now when everything was back to normal, she was as far from it as possible.

_I'm scared of you,_ she admitted to herself feeling tears burning behind her eyes. _I'm scared of not being myself for you. I'm scared of not being enough of myself for you. I'm scared of looking at you and seeing a stranger and of talking to you and being a stranger._

_You're a dreamer Cloud,_ _a drifting dreamer who knows no reality. You're a dreamer too busy dreaming of a life that belongs in a different universe to dream of one right here. And your dreams broke mine and I can only wait in this universe and watch you venture into another._

_I'm here Cloud, but you shouldn't be. Reality is too harsh for dreamers._

_I learned that from you._

_Remember? Once upon a time, I was a dreamer too._

But Tifa had stopped dreaming when he started. Cloud's dreams were ones that shattered hers, contradicting hers in the most hurtful of ways. She couldn't be with Cloud when Cloud wanted to be with Aerith. It was really that simple.

She was grateful that he'd come to the celebration. He made the children happy. He made her happy by being here.

But being here meant she would watch him walk away again, and Tifa didn't think she could live through the sorrow of having him leave her once again. It was easier to avoid dealing with him even if that thought alone was a dagger to her heart.

But Tifa had little choice and, forcing all the thoughts out of her mind, she slipped away heading outside, leaving behind her a raging party, a deafening celebration, and a worried hero.


	2. Light of the Universe

A/N: I'm really sorry for the long wait. I wrote and rewrote this chapter more times than I can remember and I just never seemed satisfied with the result. Anyway, hope you like it.

I want to thank everyone who reviewed. I honestly didn't think I'd get that many reviews for one chapter. You guys are the best.

**Light of the Universe**

_Alone, lost in the dark hallways of my grief and solitude, I wait. Not for you but for the promise of the day when I'll see you again. _

_Alone, the way I chose to be, I sat down by the flower-bed and let my memories wander beyond my darkened thoughts and bring you to me. Flowers spread around me, the brilliant rays of the sun casting golden light over their leaves as those blinding beams peer through the broken windows. I felt the light spread like magic over the flowers and the floorboards and I know that the light would show me hope if I just try to look at it._

_But the windows of my soul creak in protest and I can't open my eyes because I haven't seen the light in so long. So I close them and I think and remember the simple pleasure of existence._

_Once upon a time, the hero of the planet was a lost boy who'd joined the resistance for the soul purpose of survival. He was the young boy who'd seen his idol turn into a monster aimed at destroying the frail threads of a child's life, a little boy who'd given up the world for a chance to be recognized._

_Once upon a time, the hero of the planet was only the hero of the little girl next door._

_And I see the windows of your soul._

_And the light of the universe is shining within._

_My eyes open, the shock of seeing yours in my thoughts too big to withstand, the guilt too intense to bear. _

_Alone, I left you with nothing but your uncertainties, your wandering thoughts to offer you the explanation that I could not find the courage to admit. Alone, I gave you grief and alone I grieved for you._

_But when the night comes, I know I'll find solace in the chance of a dream you visit to show me a glimmer of hope. But your eyes hold the light of the universe and haunt my dreams, slowly taking away every other image, every other face and every other feeling, every other wish and every other memory until I see nothing but the magical twilight of glimmering rubies in my mind. _

_And I've only just realized how much I…_

…_I miss your eyes_

* * *

_So what if the world is fading away?_

The misery began inside him before he'd even had the chance to recognize it, a slow rusty movement gaining speed and strength with every second that ticked away into the oblivion of the past.

_You're still here._

But even though she was, his heart shuddered in his chest, jumped and jerked as sly, shadowy fingers curved around it and twisted and forced pain to spring into action. And that was where the mercy ended.

His heart told him that he was losing her. But his mind was telling him that he already had.

And on those rare occasions when trusting his mind over his heart meant that he might as well stop trusting altogether, Cloud understood that the better choice was sometimes worthy of neglect in favor of the _right_ choice.

After all, the last time he'd decided to follow his mind's advice, Tifa was alone for months while he wandered through the winding halls of the sneering, contemptuous guilt bleeding black against his arm. Guilt had nearly ruined his life. And then it had nearly ended it. And, as if that hadn't been enough, his guilt had nearly killed her too.

Fortunate was too weak a word to describe how he felt when he'd blurred to her side, trampling flowers and earth, and yanked her into his arms to listen to the soft breaths that managed to make it through her lips.

Guilt taught him to be late and then taunted him with the achievement, weaving brutal fingers into the frail threads of his thoughts while it cackled as he obediently inflected suffering upon himself. And Cloud had been a pawn in its insane game for too long, dragging along the people he loved more than anything in the world.

When he really tried to save himself from it, when he'd given Tifa the chance to help him fight it back, he realized that that powerful guilt had never been so powerful at all. Beneath it all, something stronger, truer and much more sincere throbbed a tireless rhythm next to his heart. It was the manifestation of hope, the dream of his heart, the reason he was Cloud Strife. It was the little girl who used to live next door.

For so long, that tireless guilt he'd endured had been somewhere at the surface, but it had never been at the center. That was reserved for deep, ancient feelings he'd kept to himself since he was a little boy.

Her closeness was receding. Cloud could feel it in his bones, a dull, incessant hum of emptiness spreading somewhere where his heart was supposed to be beating with the relief that being near her brought. He would have looked up at her, spoke to stop her but he needed to scrape together the scattered bits of courage left inside him, and hope that the result was enough to confront all those questions that looked so much like pearly tears in her eyes.

Tense hands fisted and shaking by his sides, Cloud kept his gaze to the floor, swallowing the lump of frustration forming in his throat. He was terrified of the rejection Tifa had every right to inflict. He was terrified of being late again.

His heart beat erratically in his chest, a broken rhythm that needed her voice to be soothed. Her name escaped unattended from his lips and when he found the courage to open his eyes, he found himself staring longingly at that place where Tifa should have just stayed and been close

_Come back to me, _he thought miserably, letting the stinging loneliness remind him of just how much she'd endured when he abandoned her.

His tired gaze turned to the floor, burning with something strange and moist with something foreign and he pushed a hand onto his face, rubbing almost aggressively in an attempt to ease the lines of worry etched there.

She was always walking with him, towards him, _to_ him that everything felt so wrong when Tifa was walking away.

_I'm so much stronger when you're watching me be strong. Don't let go just yet. Tifa. I'm here for you and I'm here with you and I don't want to be anywhere else._

When he left the airship, and the people too delighted in their celebration to notice his gloomy attitude, and stepped into the different world outside, he looked for her with glistening eyes and a heart on the verge of breaking. She had her back to him, standing in the solitude of the night, her reflection shimmering off the bits of Zack's sword next to her that weren't covered in dirt. The moonlight was faint above her, casting her lonely figure in shifting shadows and yet, in his eyes, she sparkled like diamonds against the inky sky.

She looked like she'd been tired for a long time, like she'd been waiting for the right moment to give up. And it looked like Tifa believed the right moment was finally here.

_Not just yet, Tifa. Not ever._

The beautiful brunette was oblivious to his presence, a fact that, on its own, was enough to spark concern and fear inside him and for a moment, it meant everything to Cloud that he was standing right there, in the shadows of the magnificent Sierra, just watching her, ready to protect her, to keep her safe and not be late anymore. Even with her back to him, Tifa was beautiful and here and that was all that mattered. His whole world was standing mere feet away. He only needed to reach out…

Behind him, the airship loomed majestically, swallowing him in its shadow, a silver silhouette glistening against the inky sky. It offered little protection from the blowing winds but Cloud was grateful for the hint of relief he found in the nearness of his friends.

Inside, laughter escaped the metallic confines and reached his ears, momentarily drowning out the sound of his own pounding heart to soothe it into a gentle beat.

Somehow, the laughter reminded him that he wasn't alone and that no matter what he did, people cared.

And his blue gaze shimmered a little more intently as it gazed longingly at the one person who cared the most, wishing with all his heart that her eyes were on his instead of the city.

He hadn't seen her eyes in so long…

"Tifa?" His voice was low and soft-spoken, filled with longing made infinite in the sound of her name. And he watched her tense up in recognition, stiffen as he announced his presence, and still staying away, shrinking further into the shell she'd used to shield herself from his distance.

His heart broke as he watched her heart-broken image and he took a step towards her, nearly reaching out before the thought of being pushed away forced his hand back down to his side.

"Are you okay?" he asked, hating himself, because deep down, he knew that she wasn't and wouldn't be for a while.

He sighed again, feeling guilty and frustrated, and took one more step towards her.

"Are you going to be okay?"

He waited, nearly pleading for an answer and sighed when he got none. In her own little world, Tifa was lost to him, a small part of his past that just didn't matter enough to belong anywhere in the present and future.

She shook her head, running nervous hands through her hair then dropped them to hug her arms. The wind seemed to pick up as the misery overwhelmed her, sending chills throughout her body that had her shivering in consequence.

"It's cold," Cloud murmured seeing her shiver in the moonlight. "Come inside with me."

But Tifa shook her head again wondering why her chest seemed so constricted. The confusion in her mind kept her from forming any thoughts, any memories that could have made dealing with Cloud easier on her. She'd accepted his departure months ago, accepted a life without him in it. She had accepted it after days of misery and nights of hope and she'd learned to just be without him. Back then, it had been easy to see things his way and understand his need for solitude, but now that he was here, so close, healthy and well, it made it so much harder to understand why he'd ever left at all.

He was so close to her, she could feel his fingertips on the backs of her shoulders.

"Don't say anything," he said softly, rubbing gloved hands gently down her arms in a nervous effort to ease the chilliness coating her skin. "But please be okay."

She shook her head vigorously trying to keep the thoughts from overwhelming her and, unconsciously, her eyes found the broken trail that led to Midgar and away from Cloud. She didn't think then, didn't even consider the danger of venturing down the broken path in the middle of the night and almost instantly, she took a step towards it.

It was the only step she managed to take.

Cloud's arms were strong and steady when they circled her waist to bring her back into him and he held on tight, even when she froze in his arms, and turned to hide his face in the crook of her neck.

"No, not yet," he murmured into her skin, eyes closed as he breathed her in. He waited for a while, just having her in his arms then shifted to press his cheek against hers. The smile flitting upon his lips was vague but there, just like the peace that was beginning to paint hope in his heart. "It's okay if you need to be alone for a while. I understand, but I…I can't be late anymore."

Silence tailed his words, heavy and foreboding and it dragged on for long moments that left him shuddering with longing. In his arms, Tifa dealt miserably with the tension it brought, fear finding a way to leak into her body and carve itself into her heart.

Torn between surprise and anguish, and knowing without trying that she could never bring herself to move out of his embrace for both their sakes, Tifa hugged his arms around her waist, curving shaking fingers around his forearms and hesitated to press back into him, too afraid to give into the comfort he offered and too afraid of losing it.

He felt her shake her head against him, a soft movement that had him jerking with a different kind of fear. There wasn't much strength left in her, She'd given it all to him, and in the process, she'd absorbed the weaknesses that had slowly been destroying him for months.

_I didn't mean to…_

He could see bitter parts of himself in her. Losing faith, giving up, surrendering, they were all those things that she'd taken away from him when she gave him her faith and then her strength and everything else he'd let her give and as he stood with her now, just feeling her, Cloud was beginning to understand why all the anguish, the misery and the despair had been fading. Tifa had been drawing them into her, taking them in to fill in that harsh empty space he'd created when he stole her heart.

_I'll take care of your heart._

"I _won't_ be late anymore."

Her shuddering hadn't died down. Fear was still stroking rough fingers against her heart, but when her hands quivered against his arms then slid across to find his, Cloud understood that there had been something beautiful in her that he'd fixed with his words. Maybe her trust in him wasn't restored, but he took comfort in the fact that it wasn't completely gone either.

_It's all I ever needed_. _I can't believe in myself if you won't believe in me. And I can't be myself if you won't be a part of me._

A soft smile found a place to settle upon his lips and he welcomed it freely, drinking the knowledge that all those little bits of uncertainty lingering inside him were finally mending to create one wonderful entity that looked so much like Tifa.

He listened to her breathing in, breathing out, being here and, by some magical means, being his in that special subtle way that had bound them together since their childhood, and as he loosened his embrace to soothe the slender fingers that were desperately seeking his, he realized, with growing hope, that Tifa wasn't moving away anymore.

Her hands closed around his with frantic longing, pouring passion into the simplest of all gestures.

But it felt incomplete somehow, barricaded behind walls he didn't remember creating and wanted to destroy.

He shook his fingers free, stilled when he felt her tense up and grip harder and then slowly freed his hands from hers, whispering quiet reassurances before the past found a place to leak into her again and taint her mind with painful memories.

"You're here. I'm not going to lose that."

And even as he briefly took that single step away, he kept his eyes and his mind and his heart with her.

_I won't lose you again._

The heavy leather of his gloves hit the soaked ground with a soft splash and then he was securing her hands in his, even as he turned her around to face him, gripping with the ardor of a man unwilling to ever let go.

His eyes lingered on their joined hands, softened as he memorized the image of those smooth, slender fingers tucked protectively in his, and when he lifted his eyes to find her face and her faith in him on it, it dawned upon him that the sensation coursing through his body at that one moment was what it meant to be complete.

"I won't let myself lose you again…"

He trailed off, breath catching, eyes widening, heart beating wildly when her eyes, wide and stunned and devastatingly beautiful shot up to meet his, the unbridled shock he'd caused when he took her hands in his ungloved ones still echoing in their mysterious depths. Pale, shimmering blue colliding with deep brown, their gazes met in one defining moment and held for many more.

Cloud forgot to breathe.

She'd been a mere child when he first drowned in her hypnotizing eyes, and years later, Cloud had yet to find his way to the surface. The little girl from next door had pulled him in with no hope of ever escaping.

Her eyes had been the sunshine of his childhood sky. Young and oblivious, Cloud remembered gazing deep into them that very first time she introduced herself, his brow creasing in concentration as he tried to identify all those mysteries that swirled within her curious orbs, even when his small hand reached out to shake hers and the sound of his name tumbled out in a nervous mumble.

Thinking back to that magical moment when he first met her, Cloud smiled a soft, serene smile knowing that everything was going to be alright. He had her memories and he had her and she had him. Even if Tifa didn't know it yet.

He looked at her again, studying every little detail he'd missed even when she hid from him and realized that even after he'd left, Tifa had never stopped being the best part of his life.

Above them, stars twinkled and glimmered the same way they did when they witnessed the promise he made to her once upon a time, and Cloud remembered watching her eyes twinkle the same way when she laughed and glimmer with tears when she cried.

_And I remember that the sun never felt so warm and that the world never felt so calm and when your gaze locked with mine, I was your hero and you were the angel of my heart. _

_I found myself in you and, in the windows of your soul, a small, sad boy who was just learning the magic of a smile._

_Magic happens when I look into your eyes._

_I found my light in the mysteries of your eyes and I find us everyday in the memories of your gaze. So…when the rest of the world is gone, keep your light with me and keep your faith in me and keep your gaze on me._

_Don't you know how much I love your eyes?_

* * *


	3. Melodies in the Dark

**A/n:** Thanks for the reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

**Melodies in the dark**

_The world moved like a bullet and I lingered behind, bitter in the loneliness I chose to indulge in. _

_The walls of the church offered no protection, the windows no light and the flowers in the center meant no more peace. They did at first, they offered sanctuary, but as time traveled with me, I understood that sanctuary was not what I needed._

_I have grieved for so long, that grief was almost tangible in the air. I have hidden for so long, that courage was nothing but a wish that never will happen._

_And I have seen you in my dreams so lonely and so alone that my dreams were the nightmares that kept my heart and my mind stricken with the longing to be the hero who'll come to your rescue._

_The pain in my arm never dies and as I wait, it slowly burns a scorching path of agony up my body where the pain changes into a war against my sanity. Voices yell in my head, invisible fingers quietly scraping against the walls of my mind and I find myself weeping because I wanted the world and everything else to forget that I existed._

_Except you. _

_Your face never leaves my thoughts and at night, it lingers in my dreams, breaking the darkness with embers of hope. Even when I am without you, your voice is a melody, singing soothing words in my ear. Your songs are the air I've never given myself the chance to breathe and your words are the miracles that I never watched happen._

_I left because you are the one weakness of my strength. I never realized that you were my strength. And when I did, I was late._

_Through the voices, the image of your face fades away and the only trace you leave is the lingering echo of my name._

_And then it wasn't so hard to understand why I…_

…_I miss your voice._

He saw it a second too late.

Doubt, fear and longing battling for domination over her.

"It's alright, Tifa."

But her fingers slid smoothly from between his and she curled her arms around herself, letting her eyes wander to the distance again while her mind drifted on a journey of its own, drawing upon memories that never felt complete.

The cold slammed into him like a sledgehammer when she shook her hands free, sharp and unforgiving, and he waited, giving her time, giving her space even though every second he spent agonizing over the damage she was doing to him when she looked away, broke a little piece of his heart with it.

Tifa found his eyes again, and held them and Cloud would have smiled and laughed and yanked her into his arms again if Tifa wasn't slowly, surely backing away from him, to that sword, to Midgar, to where he wasn't.

He made no attempt to stop her. And that alone _did_ stop her. And the lines on her face changed and the wariness in her eyes melted until twin flickers of concern ignited in her eyes.

_No, Tifa! I'm not too late!_

But it was what she saw him think. It was what she believed to be coursing in his mind. Too late. And then the flickers in her gaze changed to glistens that broke his heart into two.

They moved like water in her eyes, formed water in her eyes, and Cloud's fists clenched viciously when he took in the sight of her struggle with the tears he'd never intended to trigger.

"I'm sorry."

She only mouthed the words, her lips trembling as she held back the sobs.

Cloud kept his gaze steady on her, watching her spin around, and take the trail down to Midgar. It shouldn't have made sense to him at all, her concern, her words, her leaving but he understood it so well that his chest tightened at the thought. Tifa wasn't crying because of him anymore. She was crying for him, because she knew that every second she spent beyond his reach was a lifetime's worth of pain to add to the one already inside him.

She was crying because she was making him hurt. And it was the kindest thing she could do for him.

Because in Tifa's mind, if she were to hurt him, then Cloud wouldn't stand a chance of hurting himself. Because if the choice was never there. He could never be too late to make it.

_I'm not too late!_

But it felt like he was and this time, there was anger in his stance, in his eyes. Too late had no business showing up now. And this time, he couldn't merely chase it away. He would eliminate it altogether.

For Tifa.

He ran then, down the path, into Midgar, his boots disrupting the quiet puddles of water left behind in the aftermath of the rain. And when he caught up to her, using strength and grace and agility and the image of her smile to drive him there, she was standing outside the church, her hands trembling against the doors.

"I was lonely too," he murmured stopping with his face buried in the hair at the nape of her neck and his hands curled over hers, pulling them away from the door.

Cloud saw worlds come and go in her eyes when he turned her to face him, dreams form and break and gazed in wonder at everything happening inside her and reveled in everything happening inside him because of her, feeling peace and fulfillment give him a chance to experience a different kind of survival.

"Without you," he finished belatedly, the words emerging in a weary sigh.

Silence fell like an evil spell over them. Cloud watched her eyes carefully, unsure of just how much of that silence he was ready to take while Tifa let her eyes wander from the church to the stars to the man who stood before her holding her hands in a grip that spoke volumes of how much she meant to him.

Inside her, feelings she wasn't sure off churned restlessly. Cloud had been gone for too long, preferring a life of memories and solitude to the one with her. The pain had been burning at first and then it had numbed gradually as the world around them slowly turned into chaos. And now that the world was back on its feet, the pain was straining to rise to the surface again. Except that Cloud was here now, standing right there and Tifa just didn't know what to feel after being alone for so long.

Loneliness had never been her choice. Cloud made that choice for the two of them. And that had broken her more than his disappearance ever could.

"It hurt here." The words were spoken with such aching softness that Tifa's eyes whipped up to his face, worry sparkling in them, so intense that she failed to notice the movement of their linked hands until he'd lifted them to his chest and had her fingers pressed securely to his heart.

She jerked, tensing up and pulled at her hand instinctively, but Cloud pressed down harder, gently imprisoning her hands underneath both of his.

"Don't Tifa," he turned, pleading. "Just understand. It _hurt." _He paused, carefully watching her reaction then spoke again. "It hurt to be lonely and it hurt to be without you."

She trembled, terrified as his heart beat steadily underneath her fingers and cast wide, shimmering eyes onto their hands. She fell into a strange trance, feeling the world fade around her until all she could hear was the steady beat of his heart thundering restlessly in her ears. And the unfamiliarity of it was frightening. Right in front of her, Cloud was changing so fast that she couldn't keep up.

She didn't notice that he'd shifted and moved closer, that his hands had slowly let her go, leaving her staring helplessly at her own fingers splayed intimately against his heart. She didn't notice anything until she was ripped out of her reverie by the brush of his thumbs against her tear-stained cheeks.

Her eyes, still glazed with despair were wetter than before when they locked onto his, holding a quiet plea he wasn't sure he wanted to understand.

"I'll _never_ be too late."

She shook her head in a fierce protest, shaking, tears threatening to rush unattended, down her cheeks again, and at his chest, her fingers curled into a tight fist in his shirt, shaking with anguish.

"Then why don't I know you anymore?"

The words were spoken softly, steadily, through a tight grip of control, but once they were freed from her lips, the control swiftly dissipated and left her trembling violently in the aftermath, replaying his earlier words over and over in her mind until her throat burned with the sobs she'd been holding back for months.

"Why did you hurt yourself?"

He wasn't surprised by her question the way he'd expected to be, and he wasn't surprised when she laced her fingers through his and gripped tightly.

"Why did you hurt me?"

Her voice was so soft and broken, Cloud would have choked it up to his imagination if he hadn't known that imagination could never sound so heart-wrenchingly beautiful and in a single moment, his mind was cast backwards to that moment in time when he first figured out just how much he loved to hear her voice.

_My hero..._

She'd turned him into a hero when she asked him to be hers. And her voice had been so full of faith, so genuinely confident, that he'd almost backed out on his decision to leave Nibelheim terrified of spending a single day without hearing it.

He remembered that day when the soft tunes of her voice had first shot through his young heart like cupid's arrow and carved itself into his memory forever. At the well, when the stars witnessed the promise he'd made to her, Tifa had the little boy in him shaking with the fear of a future where the only thing he knew was that she wouldn't be beside him. But he left her anyway shouldering the uncertainty as the man in him chose to carry the memory of her sweet voice in a special place in his heart.

Cloud never did forget her. Not even when he'd forgotten himself.

He smiled.

She didn't need to doubt him anymore. The hero of the little girl next door was here to stay and even when the volatile silence settled in once again, Cloud only heard peace in the soft sound of her voice, still echoing in his ears and found peace in the chance to hear it again.

_Like I heard it in my dreams and in those moments when my eyes wouldn't close. And I heard it with the whisper of the winds and the rumble of the ocean and in the soft susurration of the flowers in the church._

_I listened to the melodies in the dark, of the words you spoke to me and I found the vision of peace I thought I'd lost forever. The darkness only lifted when your voice was there to lift it and your voice was always there, the soft whispers of your words teaching me how to hope._

_And then it never mattered how hard anything was, because I learned how to shut out the pain and the grief and the loneliness and to spend the hours between dawn and dusk listening to those songs in the dark. And the hours melted into days tainted with the melodies of the only voice I'll never forget._

_Don't you know how much I love your voice?_

* * *


	4. Magic of the Stars

A/n: Really sorry for the very long delay. Hope you like this chapter.

**Magic of the Stars**

_Solitude holds no will to set me free. Into its trap, I let myself be lured, and trapped, I breathe air tainted with regret. It's heavy and I feel my lungs shake underneath the staggering force of it, battling in their own subtle way for the life of my despairing sanity. _

_My sanity is weak without yours._

_And I am nothing without you._

_I step into the middle of the garden and my body stiffens when I feel the overwhelming sense of loss again, building up inside like the deadly heat of a volcano ready to erupt. The pain in my arm lingers still, but my mind is numb to it now as the deeper, darker agony of staggering emotions slowly spreads. I know I will lose. I know that nothing is left for me to win but the shred of hope that slipped from between my fingers when I slipped from between yours._

_Hope has abandoned me and light has no rays to offer, but in the darkness of my new life, I find the light of your heart, feeding me strength and filling me with hope._

_The number of times that I have dreamt of you is the number of times I dreamed. Every second, my mind sees you and my heart feels you and my soul calls your name. I have seen you when my eyes are open and I have seen you when sleep comes to take me away from the cruelty of this world._

_My dreams are filled with your eyes and your lips, with the smile that paints miracles on your face and I realize that now, wide awake and waiting for hope to find its way to me, the miracles flash again. And as I grip onto the fleeting warmth, onto the glittering images of memories and dreams that carry your face, I see the gift of the stars flicker upon your lips._

_And I breathe._

_The darkness was not strong enough anymore, too weak to stop me from gathering the strength to form a smile triggered by the one I saw on you._

_And in that split second, beautiful peace floods into me, gushing into my soul like water though a broken dam. The warmth is so quick to take over, so unbridled that the pain is gone in an instant and the sorrow quickly disintegrates and basking in that newfound feeling, I want nothing else to matter._

_But I can't do it because it does matter that I…_

…_miss your smile_

* * *

She waited for him, framed in midnight and moonlight and rain, worriedly aware that she was pressing for answers he wasn't really ready to give. Cloud could see it in her eyes and as he gazed, drawn in by the shifting hues of mahogany and gold and terrified by the prospect of a rejection capable of destroying what was left of him, he wondered if there was any hope left for him with the angel in his arms.

Her hands still chilled in his, he squeezed tighter, the concern in his eyes dissolving into anxiety when the thought of her distance managed to leak into his mind. He needed to keep her close or his heart would stop beating altogether. It only beat for her anyway.

_I didn't mean to hurt you,_ he pleaded to himself, a silent, desperate answer to the question she'd uttered moments ago.

The words stirred and churned in his mind, a broken record that kept building upon the agony already brewing inside him. There was no other answer. Nothing could justify the misery he'd put her through and the pain he'd poured generously into her when he disappeared. But somewhere in his mind, her survival registered and Cloud understood that only one thing could have kept her strong enough to withstand everything he'd caused.

Tifa loved him too. And she loved him so much more than either of them had thought possible.

"But I didn't die, Tifa," he explained quietly, remembering the echo of her screaming voice in his mind, shouting his name when the explosion took him away, however briefly, from the land of the living. "I chose life. That's where you were."

At his words, Tifa hesitated, her eyes shifting away from his then back again. Cloud felt her hands sliding from his and instantly clamped tighter onto them.

"I was here when you didn't want it, right?"

He smiled but it was miserable. There was truth in her words.

She freed her hands from his grip and he felt her fingers, a moment later, against his jaw, turning his eyes back to ones that were wide and earnest and smeared with tears and hope. She was waiting for him to admit it, to agree, to say the words that were both lies and truth. Tifa was right. She _was_ here. It was why he couldn't bear the thought of living in a weaker man's body.

"Right, Cloud?" Her voice was soft but it startled him all the same.

He turned his face into her hand and skimmed his lips over her fingertips, eyes closed, grateful for what he had at that exact moment to think of wanting more. When she shuddered, he smiled and lifted clear blue eyes to the misty amber of her gaze.

And he let himself drown.

"You were here when I was dying, Tifa. I didn't want you to watch it happen."

She frowned, reading into him, believing his words even when she was struggling to understand them. Her hand flitted back down to her side and Cloud let her fingers go but refused to break eye contact. She didn't have to listen to him to believe him. She only had to look at him, to truly see him and she would know. He didn't doubt that Tifa would understand past the words he spoke. She was the one who taught him how to do it.

When the silence pressed on, he felt himself grow tense and restless. His patience and his strength and his hope were running thin, and though he could afford to let patience and strength fade away, the loss of hope would simply mark the end of whatever existence he deemed himself worthy of.

He didn't care to exist in the world if he couldn't exist in Tifa's heart.

"Do you understand, Tifa?" he pressed, gently. Tifa gazed at him, lost in the intensity of his gaze then blinking back into the present, she dropped hers to the ground.

Something about the look in her eyes tugged at his mind, drawing a frown to his face. There was something else, past the sadness and the frustration and the tiny flickers of hope. And even though he wasn't sure what it was, he knew it didn't belong there.

"I was dying when you weren't here. I didn't want you to _let_ it happen." Her eyes found his again and there was strength in there, gathering behind the watery sheen glistening against the gold. "Do _you_ understand, Cloud?"

Because she saw pain flash across his face she turned from him and simply looked at the church doors remembering how rigid and suffocating that barrier of worn wood had seemed when Cloud was on the other side of it.

"It hurt so much to think of you…." She hesitated, seemingly breaking down all over again. Her voice was cracking under the pressure of the tears lodged in her throat, and she breathed deeply determined to keep them at bay, determined to stay strong, to show him that she was and had always been strong.

"So I didn't."

When his hands found her arms and clasped onto them, the sobs pushed harder and she had to grit her teeth, to fist her hands tightly till her nails dug into her palms just to keep herself from falling apart.

"Tifa," he sighed.

"But it even hurt _not_ to think of you. …"

Her voice held that same, elusive quality he'd seen in her eyes moments ago, something that simmered just below the strength and the fear mixing wondrously when she spoke. And again, it made him tense and wary and even more uncertain.

"Tifa, don't."

She freed herself from his hands and stepped away from him, needing the distance, then turned and met his gaze evenly.

"I couldn't do it…make myself think of think of you and I couldn't stop doing it," she finished softly, gathering her composure one more time now that she'd stepped away from him.

"I know, Tifa. I understand."

The silence fell thick and sudden in a single moment and Cloud felt the brush of alarm in his chest bubbling up his throat. He strained to listen to her breathing, soft and even through the stillness of the night and waited for her to break it all because he couldn't.

For a moment, Tifa was a million miles away instead of just a few feet, and for a second, her heart was farther away from his hands than it had been his entire life.

His eyes were wide and distraught, but Tifa was quiet and beneath his troubled gaze, still. And past the surface, deep inside her, he watched the churning waves of clashing emotions crash against her heart, a storm he'd been too cowardly to confront before and too scared to do so now.

"I don't think you do."

Guilt, he thought abruptly, alarm erupting in his chest. Her voice sounded like guilt.

She spoke with a heart-breaking softness and a tragic finality that was so intense, he thought he could hear heart shatter. He reached out to her with a trembling hand, needing the comfort of contact then dropped it to his side when he realized that he had none to offer back.

The quiet of the night pressed on despite the rain, the tension with it, a heavy, powerful weight, so thick, that a knife could have sliced through it and split the very air around them in two. And then her voice, strong as a warrior's and soft as an angel's forced the nearly tangible tension to shatter.

"Cloud?" she called him softly and he would have smiled if he wasn't so terrified of what she would say.

"What is it, Tifa?"

She stood still, quiet at first, afraid to look up at him.

"I wanted to hurt you back," she confessed, her voice quiet and strained, a heart-wrenching mix between sorrow and shame. At her sides, her hands shook, curled into white-knuckled fists and she stood rigid with her head hung low, shivering and shaking with a strange fear that Cloud hadn't known he could put in her.

It didn't surprise him. She rarely did anymore.

"It's okay," he whispered quietly, his heart breaking at the heart-broken image she displayed.

He made a move towards her reaching out, but she took a step away from him, her arms still trembling when she curved them around her waist. She hugged herself tightly, breathing slowly to keep the tears at bay.

He hated that he couldn't find the courage to touch her.

"I wanted to forget you." Her voice was cracking beneath the emotional pressure, choking up and the sly, smoky fingers twisted around his heart, dug deeper.

"It's okay." He spoke a little more forcefully, tensely, curling his own fingers into fists.

He silently cursed his helplessness, the coldness of the things he'd done to both of them and struggled to fight the dormant demons of guilt that were stirring in his mind again.

And he hated that he couldn't fight them without dragging her along for the ride.

"I wanted to hate you."

Her voice was trapped in tears, tight and whispery and he watched as she lifted quivering hands, slowly, and pressed her face into them, hiding from the world, from him and still being strong.

And he hated that he couldn't stop the tears she wouldn't shed.

He only ever wanted her to smile.

"It's okay."

Because he was afraid he would lose it, he spoke the words through clenched teeth, and his fists tightened, short nails biting into his palms. He was desperate to make her hear him now, because he was on the verge of giving up altogether. "I understand."

"Cloud?" His name came out in a raw, exhausted whisper laced with tears that she wouldn't let fall, and twined with anguish she wouldn't set free, and he looked up to watch her breathing slowly, keeping the tears and the anguish at bay, being his strength when he was being her weakness.

He stepped closer, just a few paces, both physical and emotional exhaustion creeping up on him. And dared to hope when she didn't step away, when she stood her ground, dropped her hands and lifted her head.

The silence that came this time, when her liquid gaze leveled on his was different. Exhaustion was evident in her eyes, an extreme weariness that went far beyond the physical. And the desire to put it all behind her, to just start over was leaking through the cracks of guilt and tension he'd seen before.

And when he looked at her, _into_ her, and saw more peace than sorrow and more of Tifa than of the miserable stranger that had her face. He stilled when she held his gaze firmly, when she breathed words laced with fatigue and when she turned his world into heaven.

"Don't let me."

His heart jumped at her words, pounded a rapid rhythm against his chest. And then, she took a step toward him, hesitated for a lingering moment before she moved another, then stopped to look at him through the fluttering strands of hair swaying across her face, shaking too much to brush them away. "Okay?"

Eyes softening, he gazed, all the exhausting emotions churning inside him slowly fading away behind the quiet, limitless happiness expanding in his chest. She was terrified, Cloud could see it in her eyes, genuinely afraid that he would simply leave after the terrible things she'd confessed.

And he thought it was beyond lovely as he walked over to her, that it was almost heartbreakingly sweet to know that she'd been fighting her own self for him. And that she was trusting him to fight with her.

"I don't need to, Tifa," he sighed, stopping right in front of her.

She kept her gaze fixed on his as he approached her, wide and afraid and trusting and hopeful. And he held her eyes with his when he lifted both hands to curl her hair behind her ears, watched them close reflexively when he swept his thumbs across her delicate cheekbones to wipe the tears that lingered there, then simply framed her face in his hands and leaned in to press his lips to her forehead.

"You never could hate me."

There was a fleeting touch of amusement in his words, a smile in his voice floating somewhere within the fatigue and it had her shifting beneath his lips, tilting her head up, tipping wet, curious eyes to all the blue, to find the sincerity of what he spoke resting softly in his gaze.

And Tifa saw it shining there, the smile and the amusement and the simple truth, and both stunned by the teasing reality of his statement and touched by the sincerity of his words, her eyes softened, the fear dropping in a flash and the tight line of her mouth transformed into a lovely smile, a soft curve of moist lips, a spark of magic, a miracle in the making that had the world and everything in it wasn't wet gold, and flowing silk and pretty, smiling lips, framed in midnight and moonlight and rain, melt away into oblivion

He remembered falling in love with that smile all those years ago, remembered how it reminded him of the sun that shone after a storm, or the full, midnight moon when it lit the sky up, how it sparkled like diamonds and twinkled like little, dancing stars filling the world with magic. And here he was, doing it all over again, his only regret the number of times he'd missed out on seeing that smile when the need to leave had become too overwhelming to fight.

_So I'll spend those hours now, while I'm seeing your smile. I'll spend all those months in this one, magical moment, to make up for all those times I rejected what was prettier than the magic of the midnight sky._

_I see it all in your smile, beautiful pathways open, flooding with light, and an iridescent road, illuminated by a sea of stars that beckons me to swim through it. And I see you there, standing at the end, waiting for me with the enchanting smile, the same one I'm watching now, resting upon your lips._

_You were always waiting for me. Quietly. Patiently. Faithfully. Just waiting. Bearing the pain and the loneliness, _sharing_ the pain and the loneliness that were nearly the destruction of my soul. I can feel my soul being revived when I'm here, adoring your smile, slowly lifting from the pits of the dark void that had grown inside me when I left you, to flow into every corner of my body._

_You shine. _

_And I am only truly me when I'm seeing you shine. And its easier to be me now because I know that my eyes will always see the smile on your lips and you know that the smile on your lips is the reason for mine._

_Don't you know how much I love your smile?_

* * *


	5. Angel of my Heart

A/N: Thanks everyone for the lovely reviews! Here's the last chapter which I'm not particularly pleased with (I have no idea why) but still hope you'll like it.

* * *

**Angel of my heart**

_Existence was never meant for people like me. The pain is there. The anger is there. I can feel it gathering underneath by skin, shadowed only by the intensity of a guilt that should have died with Meteor's defeat._

_And within this anger, the agony of lost hope slowly climbs to the surface, suffocating, consuming, penetrating the weakened walls of my mind and slowly my sanity disintegrates, a pitiful entity, helpless against that crushing force._

_And as I stand at one of the colorful windows of the church, it happens again and I lean forward and squeeze my eyes shut, hoping to guide all those tormenting feelings to the outside. My hands slam against the windows, my nails cutting into the fragile glass until it cracks and I gasp, waiting for everything to leave me alone._

_The anger tempts me to push away everything. Every memory. Every image. Every thought and every feeling happening inside me and I rebel because with the loss of the memories and images and thoughts and feelings, I lose the last frail threads that bind me to you._

_I fight for you even when you don't know it. I fight against myself for you, willing to let everything go but those little traces of hope you left in my heart. I fight for you, winning because if I lose you, I lose myself. And I can't let myself disappear._

_Even if existence was never meant for people like me._

_The pain is still there. The anger is still there. But the agony of lost hope begins to fade when I arm myself with the only weapon I wield._

_You._

_My thoughts of you hold no desire to set me free. _

_And the flame of guilt in my heart was no longer burning for the flower girl._

_My dreams are tormenting in their beauty, overflowing with scenes of you and your eyes and your voice and your smile. They are heaven and they are hell, taking me on a ceaseless journey to you but never allowing me to reach. They are the splendor of human emotions tainted with visions of angels. My dreams scream for you even when you are their center and they cry for you even when you are there to brush the tears away._

_My dreams are you._

_And my nightmares are the dreams that are too guilty to find you._

_My nightmares hold more pain than any I have ever endured. When my eyes close and fail to find you, there is excruciating agony I could not have imagined. I need you to be my dreams. I need you to be there to take the pain away. I need you to make the pain of not seeing you stop hurting. I know that only the dreams you create with your presence are the ones that melt the pain in my heart._

_But it only hurts everyday because that's when I_

…_.miss you._

_

* * *

_There was a time, an eternity ago, when he'd been sitting upon a rocky ledge within the protective shadow of the Highwind, just waiting, underneath a sky that bled the crimson threat of a suspended Meteor, for a future that wouldn't come. He remembered waking up to soft breathing, and the shimmer of a rising sun as it breathed life into the distant line of the horizon.

Back then, it was Tifa who couldn't bear to shatter the moment.

But today, he held onto her like she was life, that beautiful, binding force that meant he really existed. Against him, she was so much more real than all the dreams he'd ever dreamt of her could be.

Unlike that last time, Tifa wasn't sleeping, but Cloud still welcomed the gentle weight of her head against his shoulder, and the warmth of her breath against his skin, and he even welcomed the tension that was fading from her shoulders beneath the possessive arm he couldn't quite remember curving around her.

Tifa said nothing and because of it he welcomed the silence too.

He didn't mind a silence that had her being a part of his life.

Awake, they watched a sky that wasn't stained with destruction but was freckled with thousands of diamonds, dancing about in the glazy aftermath of the rain. The sun was just beginning to burn a fiery arch in the sky, warm rays gently nudging the coolness of the previous night into the far distance and Tifa watched it with keen eyes and Cloud smiled wondering if she was remembering how she'd worried over the possibility that the moment wasn't going to happen again.

Tifa wasn't quite herself just yet. She was slowly, slowly yielding to the overwhelming reality that he was holding her in that very moment she'd been afraid to lose, and Cloud knew that she was working on cleaning away the stubborn, distorting layer of pain that coated her memories so she could remember how to be in his arms again. She needed time to adjust, time to remember and to cherish what she remembered. And she needed just a little bit of time to drink in the reality that she was really being with him without being in her thoughts and her memories and her bleary, bittersweet dreams.

And Cloud, as he skimmed gentle fingertips down her arm, drawing goose bumps and a shudder that made his smile turn a little deeper, wondered idly if he could close his eyes and spend the rest of his life here, not just feeling _her_ here, but feeling her _want_ to be here.

She shifted against him, restless in her mental mission then looked up when Cloud turned and pressed his lips quietly into her hair to calm her, tipping eyes that glimmered like burning gold to his striking sapphire miracles. And Cloud couldn't help but wonder why the curious anxiety he saw there was taking his breath away.

"Even now, I don't know how to stop it," she said to him, casting her gaze over Midgar's ruins. He waited, patiently for an elaboration but she offered none and leaned into him yet again to sink into the lovely warmth of his scent. Cloud heard the sigh, a hushed breathing that tickled the bare skin at the hollow of his throat and skimmed his eyes over to watch the nervous curling and uncurling of her fingers against her knee.

He frowned, a slight downward slant of brows and moved his shoulder back a little to draw her closer to his side.

"Stop what?" Cloud asked, pressing his free hand over hers to still her.

She didn't say anything for a moment, but the initial worry that threatened to overtake his mind was effectively swept away by the smile she pressed to his skin.

"Missing you."

Even with her head tilted down, her face turned slightly into him, hidden behind stubborn strands of dark hair, he could envision that smile teasing her lips, soft and just barely visible. It pushed him to smile himself, and sent him wondering how he'd ever survived being somewhere she wasn't.

Tifa made him want to be happy.

"Missing us," she finished after a moment's hesitation. But her voice, though a little strained with fatigue, held no trace of the agony that had plagued her earlier and, with Tifa resting trustingly against him, Cloud wasn't sure if that wondrous longing she spoke so serenely of was ever unwelcome.

"I don't think you can," he said truthfully, sweeping his gaze over Midgar before resting his eyes on the church. It seemed so far away now, the path that stretched between them a lifetime long. It seemed much more peaceful without his guilt poisoning the enchanting aura that reigned regally there and it occurred to him suddenly how depressing he'd made that beautiful place feel when he turned it into a haven of regret.

Now, he could almost imagine Aeris in there, sighing with relief, genuinely happy that he'd found his happiness and was sharing it with another.

"I don't think I can either. I don't want to."

Tifa looked up at the dreamy, contented gaze he'd cast over the ruins.

"Cloud?"

He smiled, and it was a smile that filled up all that space where the memories of his distance had been residing.

"Missing you…." He turned impossibly blue eyes to her. Blue like the sky. Blue like the sea. Blue like the beautiful dreams she drowned in every night. "It was the only bearable thing about being away."

Emotions coursed through those eyes he loved so much, too many to make out, too hypnotizing to understand.

"I still do," he continued, startling her with a quiet tone of vicious sincerity that shot straight to her heart. "I miss you more with every breath."

And Cloud thought that it was beautifully, tragically, wonderfully unsettling to know that every moment he spent near her would only ever elicit the need for more. There was simply nothing that was even remotely capable of sating his longing to be with Tifa.

Not even being with Tifa.

He was smiling at the sunrise again, his dreamy, glowing gaze fixated upon the ball of fire peeking from behind mountains that loomed majestically in the distance and she couldn't help not looking at him anymore, her eyes wide, her lips parted in shock, her mind going round in vicious spirals trying to absorb the reality of a voice so obliviously serene mouthing words that were beautifully destructive.

She didn't realize she was moving anymore. She couldn't feel anything beyond the explosive sensations firing up inside her in the aftermath of his words, but Tifa knew she was doing something, because his eyes were surprised when they turned to her, and her fingers were pressed against his cheek.

He frowned a little, his head tilting in a questioning angle and then watched as dazed eyes blinked back delighted tears.

No hesitation marred her face when she moved into his arms again, and hers were steady when they circled around his back, her fingers fisting tightly in the material of his shirt to hold on like she'd never held on before.

Cloud froze.

Her breath shuddered as she leaned into him and it took her a few eternal moments to steady it. He felt it warm and quiet against his skin and the only reason he wasn't hearing his thundering heart was because he was listening to hers.

"I'm done with the past," she mumbled against him, almost impatiently, and held on tighter when he brushed a soothing hand over her hair. "I want now."

"Tifa…." He tried to pull back, his head was spinning too fast, but she rambled on, her voice adorably impatient, her lips smiling and her eyes laughing when she looked up to meet his. And he understood that, sometime during those past few hours, when night blended into dawn, he'd said the things he needed to say to banish the painful moments of her memories into oblivion.

"I want tonight and next year and the day after forever," she added heatedly, framing his face in her fingers and holding his gaze steadily as she murmured her next words. "I want it all with you."

The sudden shudder that overtook his body was not lost to her and a hint of alarm bloomed in her eyes and her fingers tensed against his face. And though Cloud was still running late, lost in the heart-breaking beauty of the previous moment, his senses, lost in the heart-breaking beauty of her, prickled at the flicker of worry that leaked into the contact of her hands at his face.

"Cloud, what's wrong?"

"Shhh," he quieted her, smiling and shaking his head and sliding his hands over hers to keep her with him.

Tifa waited for him to overcome whatever trance had taken him away from her again and she kept her eyes on his even when his were closed and she listened intently to the words he had to say.

"Nothing can be wrong, Tifa."

He wandered down memory lane, thinking of the last few months, remembering every feeling of guilt, every trace of loneliness, every hint of pain and shred of sorrow and every flicker of hope, every last wish and want and all the dreams she'd made into miracles. And when he opened his eyes, he saw nothing but a reality far better than all his dreams put together.

And Tifa saw only her in those eyes.

"As long as you're here," he said quietly, "nothing can go wrong."

She let him lower her hands, and she let him hold her face in his and she watched, drowning in mystical blue as he watched the burning gold.

"Don't ever go," he breathed softly. "Don't ever leave. Don't ever let me be without you, because…"

_Because without you is where heaven turns into hell and where happiness turns into grief and where dreams turn into nightmares._

_Without you is when the world ends and when life stops._

_Without you is who I can't be._

_I have known no life without you. No dream and no reality. An angel like you…is the existence of me and in my mind you stay and in my heart you live and in my dreams you belong._

_An angel like you…_

_Guide me to where heaven is. Take me to where the light of the universe shines and where the melodies in the dark echo and where the gift of the stars unfold. _

_Always be the angel of my heart._

_And whatever happens, don't let me be without you._

She could feel the sincerity of his emotions through his smile...

_Because…_

And she could hear the echo of her name in his voice...

_Tifa…_

...somewhere so far away, so much farther than the blue that was slowly, slowly engulfing her...

_Don't you..._

and the lips that were touching her...

_know..._

and the words that were metling her..

_how much..._

I love you..."

* * *

A/N: It's finally done! I'll add an epliogue sometime in the near future to close it off but, yeah, that's about it for this story. Please review...reviews make my day!


	6. Hero of my Heart

_A/n: To conclude the story…_

* * *

**Hero of my Heart**

The first day of the rest of her life started with sunshine and dreams gone right and a blue-eyed hero who made it all possible.

The new sun had completely emerged from behind the distant mountains, a full, round ball of fire that chased the night's lingering darkness to the edges of the sky, turning over the last page of a past of crushed hopes and broken dreams. Morning mist dampened the air above Midgar and the filtering sunshine painted the dark city with a moist, golden haze.

Midgar looked prettier now, like a long-lost city of gold.

And somehow, the church near the edge of the city glittered more than anything else in the sunshine that danced cheerfully to a windy tune.

And Tifa smiled and watched the depressing place turn beautiful and thought of Cloud.

Through it all, he slept peacefully, finally succumbing to the welcome oblivion of a much needed rest, his first since he'd been cured of the Geostigma.

He'd been strong all night, determined to free her from the nightmares of her past and to free himself from a miserable future. And once he'd succeeded and taken care of his personal mission, the strength and determination retreated and dissolved, and exhaustion, potent and powerful, quickly took over, invited in by the lack of a need to oppose its persistent invasion anymore.

And though she'd stood completely still, paralyzed when Cloud drew her close and touched fairytale words to her lips, Tifa had managed to observe the full weight of the weariness taking control over his mind and body, perfectly aware of her part in speeding up its unstopable advance.

It was why she had smiled tenderly against his lips, taken his face in her hands, and broken the kiss, silencing murmured protests when she drew his head into her lap.

And once Cloud had settled, the sudden anxiety that had triggered his protests fading as Tifa slipped soothing fingers into his hair, he'd tipped his eyes up and found hers.

And drowned.

For hours he lay silent and just gazed up at her, mesmerized, like she was his whole world and his whole life. Entranced blue, damp with barely restrained happiness, lingered upon her golden gaze, quietly fixated, till the haze of sleep tugged gently on his eyelids, coaxing his eyes to close. And sighing, Cloud gave into it, the murmur of her name still echoing in his mind as the last of the waking awareness set him free.

And as he slept, Tifa gazed back.

_I think I understand now_, she thought silently memorizing every one of his features, finally, _finally_ seeing the elusive, hard-earned peace glowing softly on his face.

She smiled when he shifted against her, turning his head away from the glare of the sunlight that teased his face. He'd been mostly still as he slumbered, moving only once to reach for the hand she laid against his chest, clasping it in a light grip that never failed to tighten at the faintest of movements.

It was almost as if, even in his sleep, Cloud was determined to keep her anchored by his side, right where she belonged and always had.

_I know why you're still here, Cloud, and why you're still a dreamer in a reality too harsh for dreamers. _

She brushed stubborn strands of hair away from his eyes and watched the sunshine paint faint shadows on his face, tentatively recalling the thoughts that had been plaguing her mind when she escaped the celebration that rattled The Shera hours ago.

_It's not staying out of reality that's hard. It's staying in the dream. I should know because, remember?_

_I was a dreamer too._

_But then, I dreamed too much, and the more I dreamed, the harder my dreams would break and the harsher reality would get. I couldn't change my heart's dreams…so I stopped dreaming. Even you dreamed, Cloud. But when your dreams glowed too bright and screamed too loud and threatened to shatter, you didn't try to change them._

_You changed reality._

Her smile deepened at the thought, at the wonderful emotions expanding throughout her body in the wake of the new reality Cloud had dreamed up for them. It was never death or disease or the love of another that had nearly taken him away from her. It was the dreams her heart had been too scared to dream.

Cloud had been there all along, in her dreams, until she'd let go.

And he had held on.

_And now you're a dreamer in a reality fit for dreams and dreamers._

_And I'm here too._

And it was time for new dreams to be dreamt.

"Dream for me," she murmured to his slumbering form, watching the dreams flicker behind closed eyes. And smiling at him and at the golden city and at the first day of the rest of her life, Tifa spoke softly and trusted his dreams to carry her words to him.

"I'll dream with you."

* * *

_A/N: To everyone who read and reviewed this, THANK YOU! _


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